Howdy, Stranger!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Some examples of why humans have evolved as far as possible.

edited January 2009 in General Discussion
These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods...<br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On Sears hairdryer:</span><br>Do not use while sleeping.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On a bag of Fritos:</span><br>You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(The shoplifter special!)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On a bar of Dial soap:</span><br>Directions: Use like regular soap.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(and that would be how?)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On some Swann frozen dinners:</span><br>Serving suggestion: Defrost.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)</span><br>Do not turn upside down.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(Too late! you lose!)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:</span><br>Product will be hot after heating.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On packaging for a Rowenta iron:</span><br>Do not iron clothes on body.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(But wouldn't that save more time? Whose body?)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On Boot's Children's cough medicine:</span><br>Do not drive car or operate machinery.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On Nytol sleep aid:</span><br>Warning: may cause drowsiness.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(One would hope!)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On a Korean kitchen knife:</span><br>Warning: keep out of children.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation...)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On a string of Christmas lights:</span><br>For indoor or outdoor use only.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(As opposed to use in outer space?)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On a food processor:</span><br>Not to be used for the other use.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(Now I'm curious.)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On Sainsbury's peanuts:</span><br>Warning: contains nuts.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(seriously?! I would have never guessed.)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On an American Airlines packet of nuts:</span><br>Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On a Swedish chainsaw:</span><br>Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)</span><br><br><span style="font-weight:bold">On a child's Superman costume:</span><br>Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.<br><span style="font-style:italic">(Well, crap. There go my hopes and dreams. -cries-)</span><br><br>xD
2dbtohy.png

Comments

Sign In or Register to comment.